Take a break from the hard hits and laugh a little.
Come support the Honky Tonk Heartbreakers with their fundraiser at Cap City Comedy Club on Friday, May 11. Headlining Paul Varghese will have you in stitches starting at 8:00 p.m. Come early to bid on silent auction items. All the funds raised will go to help send the Heartbreakers to play The Philly Roller Girls and recoup 2012 expenses. Single tickets are $12 or take a friend and get 2 for $20 (2 drink minimum).
REAL NAME: Olympia Ellison
TEXAS ROLLERGIRL SINCE: 2010
TEAM AFFILIATION: Hotrod Honeys
POSITIONS: Blocker
INTERESTING STATS: Infamous for her fierce and imposing derriere, which often mesmerizes jammers on the track, Olympia received the honor for Best Assets at the 2011 Texas Rollergirls Whammy Awards ceremony.
Olympia and her Hotrod Honeys will be playing the 1st bout on Saturday, APRIL 21st – starting at 6:00pm. Make sure you get there early (doors at 5:15) to see the Hotrods take on the Heartbreakers. And, make sure to stick around for the second bout at 7:30pm – Hell Marys vs Hustlers!
OLYMPIA’S STORY
One of the only Texas Rollergirls whose derby name is also her given name, Olympia joined the league with no roller derby experience, but with an abundance of athletic ability and a background in track and basketball that have served her well on the derby stage. While she readily admits she may not be the fastest skater, Olympia’s pack awareness, blocking mastery and solid “foundation,” have earned her the coveted nickname “jammer killer,” and few opposing skaters have managed to escape her wrath. As the co-captain of the Hotrod Honeys during the 2012 season, Olympia is most looking forward to building up the team’s new rookie skaters, as well as kicking ass and taking names with a home team out for revenge.
WHAT OTHERS SAY ABOUT OLYMPIA
“Well, for Olympia, you just have the one word: Zeus! I really don’t know what else to say. Besides awesome!”
– Texas Rollergirls Superfan and Hotrod Honeys Mascot Big Tom
Q&A WITH OLYMPIA
Q: Do you fuel your derby practice and bouting with a specific diet?
A: I have no specific diet. I eat a lot of seafood and courtesy of my Hotrod Honeys teammate Voodoo Doll, I drink a lot of coconut juice now.
Q: Did you know before starting derby that your famous backside would be such an “asset” to your game play?
A: Ha! I had no clue. I’ve been carrying this thang (and yes, it can get heavy) all my life, and I sometimes forget it is even there.
Q: What’s your ultimate derby goal?
A: Actually, I have a little recipe for my ultimate derby goal: With my body size, I want a little bit of this (Olivia Shootin’ John’s speed), a little bit of that (Vicious Van GoGo and Rita Menweep’s strength) and a whole lot of this (Killbox’s agility). I then put that all in a pot, mix it up and turn myself into an unstoppable Olympia. This is my ultimate goal.
REAL NAME: Tavanna Porter
TEXAS ROLLERGIRL SINCE: 2007
TEAM AFFILIATION: Honky Tonk Heartbreakers, Texecutioners (2008-2009)
POSITIONS: Blocker, Pivot, Jammer (Triple Threat)
INTERESTING STATS: One of the hardest-hitting blockers in the history of the sport, Desi Cration once broke an opposing skater’s collarbone with a single hit. At the 2011 Texas Rollergirls Whammy Awards ceremony, Desi Cration was honored with the distinction of “Ms. Texas Rollergirl.”
“Desi” and her Heartbreakers will be playing the 1st bout on Saturday, APRIL 21st – starting at 6:00pm. Make sure you get there early (doors at 5:15) to see the Heartbreakers take on the Hotrod Honeys. And, stick around for the second bout at 7:30pm – Hell Marys vs Hustlers!
DESI CRATION’S STORY
A visit to a Minnesota Rollergirls bout in 2005 was all it took to hook this world-renowned blocking beauty on roller derby. Having previously played rugby and ice hockey — the perfect precursor sports to roller derby — Desi Cration was the ideal candidate for strapping on a pair of roller skates and
knocking other girls around. She skated with the Minnesota Rollergirls for two years, captaining the all-star team, before moving to Austin to join the Texas Rollergirls in late 2007. Desi Cration has long had a scary reputation as a domineering blocker, but recently took some time off from derby so she
and her husband, Texas Rollergirls announcer Koolaid, could have their son, nicknamed KoolCration Creation. The 2012 season marks Desi Cration’s return to the Texas Rollergirls, one of the most anticipated second comings in derby history.
WHAT OTHERS SAY ABOUT DESI CRATION
“Desi Cration is one of the most feared, hardest-hitting, intense blockers in the country. I have seen her take out all the opposing blockers in one devastating move. It is great to have her back on the track. She is a wonderful teammate, has a wealth of derby knowledge and a work ethic like no other.”
– Honky Tonk Heartbreaker and Texecutioner Coach Kelli
Q&A WITH DESI CRATION
Q: What do you do when you’re not playing roller derby?
A: My day job is as an alcohol researcher and lab manager in a neuropharmacology lab at the University of Texas Austin. We research the effect of alcohol on behavior and neurological processes. The rest of my waking (and non-waking) hours are spent raising my 9-month-old son. In terms of
workouts, I try to run three to four times a week. In fact, I just completed my first half-marathon! I also do core and strength training. In my spare time, I, uhh, wait, what is spare time again?
Q: What keeps bringing you back to roller derby and the Texas Rollergirls organization?
A: I love the camaraderie. I love the competition. And I love being part of the league that started the flat track revolution.
Q: What’s your ultimate derby goal?
A: I would like to win a championship. I’ve never been on a home team that’s finished higher than third, or a travel team that’s finished higher than second. I feel very strongly 2012 will be the year those trends change.
Do you want to win 2 tickets to our bout on Saturday, April 21st??
How do I enter?!
It’s simple: Make a sign for your favorite team or skater(s), and email a photo of it to bexcalibur@texasrollergirls.org by Tuesday, April 17th!
Whoa, that seems too easy, doesn’t it?
It sure does — but that’s why you need to be creative! The sign needs to be at least a poster-board size (approx. 22″x28″), but you can do BIGGER THAN THAT. Use glitter, bright colors, awesome hand-made artwork — anything that makes your sign NOTICEABLE and exciting!
Ok, and then what happens?
THEN, we will post all of the photos that fans have submitted here on our blog and we will announce a winner on Thursday! That lucky winner will get 2 free tickets to our bout next Saturday, April 21st! That lucky person will then have 2 free tickets AND an awesome sign to bring to the bout!
So, what are you waiting for?? Start making some signs!
Official Rules:
Anyone age 13 and up can enter. Winner will receive two (2) general admission tickets to the April 21st bout; the tickets cannot be transferred to another date or person. One entry per person. Signs must be family-friendly and be about the Texas Rollergirls, the four home teams, or Texas Rollergirls skaters. Signs that are not “family-friendly” (as determined by the Texas Rollergirls marketing committee) will not be eligible for the competition; the submitter will be notified via email and will have the opportunity to remake the sign and re-enter the competition. All photos must be submitted to bexcalibur@texasrollergirls.org by Tuesday, April 17th, 10pm central. All photos become property of the Texas Rollergirls for use on social media sites. Winners will be chosen by the Texas Rollergirls marketing committee and announced on our blog by Thursday, April 19th.
We will have skaters in a few locations around Austin tomorrow, April 14:
HEB on Slaughter & Escarpment
Come find our skaters tomorrow from 2-4pm at this south HEB — they’ll be near the Lonestar! Pick up a case of Lonestar, take a photo with a skater, get an autograph, and sign up to win free tickets to our April 21st bout!
Dream Machines of Austin
Pawsitive Karma Rescue is hosting a cat-adoption-fest at Dream Machines, 1401 N. I35! One of our skaters, Tamityville Horror, is the co-owner of Pawsitive Karma, and she and some of our other skaters will be there helping these kitties find permanent homes from noon-5pm. Stop by, find a new fuzzy family member, make a donation to the rescue, or just say hi and take photos with our skaters!
Forty Acres Fest at UT
Some of our skaters will be in uniform on campus from noon-4pm tomorrow. We will have a photobooth, footage to watch, and koozies as prizes for our challange-the-rollergirl contests (think you can beat us at arm wrestling or do more push-ups than we can??)! Swing by and say hi!
Did you take any pictures with our skaters?? Post them to our Facebook wall!!
REAL NAME: Emily Kern
TEXAS ROLLERGIRL SINCE: 2009
TEAM AFFILIATION: Hustlers, Texecutioners (2010-2011)
POSITIONS: Jammer, Blocker, Pivot (Triple Threat)
INTERESTING STATS: At the 2010 Texas Rollergirls Whammy Awards ceremony, after skating her first year with the Texas Rollergirls premier league, Acute Angel received honors for Best Boutfit, Most Valuable Spirit on the Hustlers home team, the Hustlers Captain’s Choice Award and Most
Valuable Spirit on the Texecutioners all-star travel team.
“Acute” and her Hustlers will be playing the 2nd bout on Saturday, APRIL 21st – starting at 7:30pm. Make sure you stay to see the champion Hustlers take on the Hell Marys. And, if 2 bouts of roller derby in one night is too much for you (in other words you are a new fan and not quite addicted yet) then arrive around 7pm to see the last few minutes of the opening bout, grab a beer and get a seat to watch Acute mix it up with the Hells!
ACUTE ANGEL’S STORY
A formidable, record-holding soccer player during her college years, Acute Angel was in search of another sports outlet post-college that would encourage her innate competitiveness, aggressiveness and penchant for sparkly outfits. That’s when she discovered the Texas Rollergirls, joined the league’s Rec-n-Rollerderby organization and became a lightning-fast jammer, soon moving up the ranks to join the Texecutioners and the Hustlers, the home team she will captain during the 2012 season. Math teacher by day, glittering derby dynamo by night, Acute Angel draws much of her inspiration from her
fellow teammates and an unlikely musical anthem: “Ice Ice Baby.”
WHAT OTHERS SAY ABOUT ACUTE ANGEL
“Acute Angel joined us from Rec-n-Rollerderby, but was not new to sports. A true athlete (she still plays on a soccer team), Acute’s derby skills continually improve, as seen as a key jammer for the Hustlers and an all-star Texecutioner. A true leader and always up for a challenge, Acute plans on another championship win for the Hustlers in the role of captain! Go purple!”
– Original Texas Rollergirl and Hustlers Founder Electra Blu
Q&A WITH ACUTE ANGEL
Q: What’s your ritual for creating the perfect boutfit?
A: Because the Hustlers are ’70s derby stars, our uniforms are purple and silver spandex — we do love our spandex! My actual skating uniform is pretty standard, so I like to have fun with my after-boutfit. I am constantly on the lookout for purple and/or silver items of clothing. Shiny/sequins/glitter are all a plus if it’s also in purple or silver. I then decide if I want to be hanging
out and talking after the bout or if I want to dance, and I choose my after-boutfit based on that.
Q: What was most challenging about graduating from the Rec-n-Rollerderby league to the Texas Rollergirls premier league and how did you tackle that challenge?
A: The biggest challenge was the increased level of skill and speed of play. Having grown up playing competitive soccer, I knew that I would have to practice and work hard every chance I got. The culture of athleticism and hard work within the league encouraged me to come in and try to keep up with the best
Q: What’s your ultimate derby goal?
A: 100% more sparkle!
Meet the rest of Acute’s team below from their 2012 team video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CJ8vAaSdPoo
REAL NAME: Rita Roxanne Rivera — “Roksi”
TEXAS ROLLERGIRL SINCE: 2011
TEAM AFFILIATION: Hell Marys
POSITIONS: Jammer, Blocker, Pivot (Triple Threat)
INTERESTING STATS: Despite a devastating injury early in the 2011 season, Babyface Assassin helped
lead the Hell Marys to an undefeated season on the road and the team’s first home-bout win
since 2008.
“Face” and her Hell Marys will be playing the 2nd bout on Saturday, APRIL 21st – starting at 7:30pm. Make sure you stay to see the Hells take on the Champion Hustlers. And, if 2 bouts of roller derby in one night is too much for you (in other words you are a new fan and not quite addicted yet) then arrive around 7pm to see the last few minutes of the opening bout, grab a beer and get a seat to watch Face mix it up with the Hustlers!
BABYFACE ASSASSIN’S STORY
Having suffered a broken ankle only a few months into her tenure with the Texas Rollergirls, Babyface
Assassin could have simply called it quits, retired from roller derby and gotten comfortable spending life on
the couch. But this little firecracker is no quitter; quite the contrary. Despite her injury, she made a
commitment to herself and her team to stay focused. She hobbled on crutches to every practice and
became a derby footage-viewing addict. And though it took much will power and support to ease back into
derby play after healing, with the support of her team and coaches, Babyface Assassin has returned for
the 2012 Texas Rollergirls season with a vengeance.
WHAT OTHERS SAY ABOUT BABYFACE ASSASSIN
“Babyface Assassin is the heart and soul of the Hell Marys. She is unabashedly exuberant and fierce,
innocent and simple on the surface, but with the calculating spirit and nerve of a cold killer.” – Hell Marys
Head Coach Punk Rock Phil
Q&A WITH BABYFACE ASSASSIN
Q: What is your personal training regimen (skating, derby and otherwise)?
A: It’s really hard to find a workout schedule that complements derby, especially coming off an injury.
This is my schedule week-in and week-out, and I try to stick to it the best I can, but I’m very strict about
making sure I have two full days off to recover. The 2012 stats will reflect if it works or not.
Monday/Wednesday: League practice
Tuesday: Speed skate
Thursday: Hell Marys practice
Sunday: SlaughterMelon’s off-skates training
Twice Weekly: Full-body, high-intensity cardio and weight-training workout
Twice Weekly: Full-body plyometric workout, usually before or after league practice
Twice Weekly: Core workout, usually combined with plyometric workout before or after league practice
Once Weekly: Full-body kettle bell/cardio workout when schedule allows
Q: How do you fuel your athletic lifestyle? Do you stick to a specific diet?
A: I don’t really have a specific diet and there is no doubt that I love bacon and boxed wine, but in order to
survive my derby and workout schedule, I do have to have some limitations. I try to only indulge on my off
days, and every other day I try a different combination of carbohydrates and proteins to get me through
practice. The easiest way to fuel my practice is a fruit smoothie with protein powder. And I keep Clif Shot
Bloks in my bag just in case I feel depleted. The hardest battle I fight is drinking enough water on a daily
basis and fighting my post-practice cravings. If I have to eat something after practice, it’s usually fruit or a
protein shake, but what I really want is a giant bean-and-cheese burrito smothered in queso.
Q: What’s your ultimate derby goal?
A: I don’t think I have an ultimate derby goal. I will conquer one at a time until I can’t skate anymore. I
wanted to skate for Texas Rollergirls — check. I wanted to be a triple threat — check. My next major goal
is to be a contributor to the next Hell Marys championship. I will give all my energy to this goal and after
that I would like to be in a solid rotation for the Texecutioners.
Also – check out Face’s team below or on youtube: Hell Marys 2012
There were big thrills and spills for the sell-out crowd at our last bout — in the first game, the Hell Marys overtook the Heartbreakers just before the halftime whistle and never looked back, while in the second game, the Hotrod Honeys earned a commanding victory over the Hustlers. On Saturday, April 21, the ascendant Hell Marys will look to cement their growing reputation when they take on the reigning champions; in the undercard bout, we’ll see an exciting rivalry played out when the Honky Tonk Heartbreakers try to bounce back from last month’s defeat by taking down the Hotrod Honeys.
In March, the Hotrod Honeys introduced their 2012 roster warrior-style — Spartan warrior, that is! It wasn’t a one-off performance, though. Asked about her team’s plans for the upcoming game, Captain Voodoo Doll explains, “We’re focusing on a scorched earth campaign of terror. Also, we really want to have a good time.” The Heartbreakers want to put a crimp in those plans, though, and have been working hard since their last game. Their approach, says co-captain Headless Highness (new to the team this year), is to work hard and smart. “Along with training hard, we have been watching a lot of footage and fleshing out some new ideas,” she says. “Our team is full of potential and skill. We’re aiming to show everyone what amazing things we’re capable of!” This match-up is especially storied, with triple-threat Rita Menweep transferring from the Heartbreakers to the Hotrods at the end of the 2011 season. “This will be the first time she has played against her former team,” says Voodoo Doll.
The Hell Marys seem to be a team on the rise, upsetting the Honky Tonk Heartbreakers in last year’s third-place playoff and repeating the feat in this year’s opening bout. On April 21, they’ll be looking to continue that trajectory when they challenge the reigning champion Hustlers, who had a rocky start to their 2012 season. “It’s a very different Hells team than we played in 2011”, says Hustlers captain Acute Angel. “They’ve added two Texecutioner standouts in Polly Gone and Barbara Ambush, and a returning veteran in Dodge. We’re looking forward to a very physical game!” Hells captain Virgo Vengeful offers the same prediction: “I expect a competitive, tough bout with lead changes to occur throughout the night.” She went on to offer some personal insights. “As a captain, I hope we continue our strong teamwork and improve from the last bout. As a captain, I would love to win! Since I’ve been on the Hell Marys, we’ve lost every bout against the Hustlers.” But the Hustlers will be fighting for every point. “We don’t like starting the season out with a loss and are looking to get a W in our column after seven weeks of intense practicing,” Acute says. Not convinced by the captains talking up their own teams? Well, Headless Highness concurs — “Last month, we met up with the Hell Marys, and they put up an impressive fight. The Hustlers lost to the Hotrods, but the Hustlers are going to be hard to keep down. I think the Hells/Hustlers matchup is going to be a great bout to watch!”
The on-track action isn’t the only thing to look forward to at the upcoming bout, though — we pride ourselves on offering a complete experience for fans of all ages! Look out for roving entertainment, t-shirt slingshots, swag giveaways, audience games and more — and don’t forget, four lucky fans will win a spot on the Lustre Pearl and Clive Bar Best Seats in the House. Our fans tell us the atmosphere is amazing inside the Austin Convention Center when the Texas Rollergirls hit the track. Tynisha Scott enthuses, “Everyone was on their feet during the first game last month, between the Hells and the Heartbreakers — it was truly electrifying!” We are always working to make our bouts bigger and better, with shorter lines, more giveaways and better games (Tynisha also tells us that we could stand to improve our Mexican wave participation rate — we will, but we need your help on that one!).
We can’t wait to see you trackside!
Event tickets are on sale now and we have a very few VIP Smack Packs left — these get you premier trackside seating, early admission and more. Or, grab a bargain with a season pass — at about $4 a game, the passes are amazing value. We offer student and military discounts, and kids under 12 always get in free — bring the family!
The Texas Rollergirls are proud to announce that they will be the first league in
the Women’s Flat Track Derby Association (WFTDA) to play on ice. The only equipment change will be the skates – instead of quad skates, they’ll all be wearing Easton hockey skates.
“The skaters are all very excited about this change,” says Maso Kiss, Texas Rollergirls’ Head of Revenue and Hotrod Honey. “We’re hoping to get Easton Hockey on board as the first-ever sponsor of roller derby on ice, which is why we’re having all our skaters wear their brand of skates.”
Most of the Texas Rollergirls are accustomed to blazing heat and are excited about taking on this new, cold-weather challenge. Some skaters, originating from cooler climes, feel like they have an upper hand. Desi Cration of the Honky Tonk Heartbreakers says, “I definitely feel like I have an advantage here. I grew up in Minnesota, so I can ice skate better than most of them. It doesn’t really matter, though, because I’ll hit them regardless of what I have on my feet. You can put me in snow boots and I’ll still knock them out.“
Bloody Mary, one of the original Texas Rollergirls who also serves as the WFTDA’s Executive Director, says, “We were the first flat track roller derby league in the world and now, derby is everywhere. To maintain our reputation as innovators in the sport, we are constantly asking ourselves, ‘What can we contribute to the evolution of roller derby?’ We want to reinvent the sport every day, yet, we also want to keep it the same – and this is the perfect solution. Skating on ice promises a new – literally cut-throat – level of play.”
But fans be warned: It will be cold. Texas Rollergirls’ head of production, Sadie Mae Care, advises everyone to bring cold-weather clothes to all the bouts. “We definitely recommend people bring, at the minimum, full sized comforters to stay warm. In order to keep the track frozen at the Austin Convention Center, we’re going to be dropping the air conditioning down to a cool 32 degrees Fahrenheit. Parkas, mittens, earmuffs, blankets; I’d bring them all.”
Not everyone is excited about the change, however, including BabyFace Assassin of the Hell Marys, who was quoted as saying: “Does this mean I have to wear pants? I hate wearing pants! Man, this stinks. Pants are really the worst thing ever.”
Be sure to buy your tickets today to join us for this monumental event at the Austin Convention Center for the first ever Texas Rollergirls ON ICE bout!
